As graceful as a...

This is me:






So, I attended my first belly dancing class.

It reminded me of high school a little, as I walked in.

Groups here.

Groups there.

And me.

By myself.

Feeling awkward and...awkward.

Luckily for me, the instructor was on the ball, and everyone lined up (with me safely in the back), and we began our class.

I was amazed at how easy it was! Of course, tapping your foot and lifting a hip isn't too challenging I suppose...

It wasn't until Kalista, our instructor, started doing something OTHER than foot tapping and hip popping that the room started to shrink and I felt like everyone was staring at the cow in the back row (me) who was desperately trying to dance around her udder, and was mooing in anxiety.

But, I felt I should embrace my uncoordinatedness (don't think that's a word).

"Has anyone never done this?"

"OOO! ME ME ME!" I shouted, waving my arm vigorously so everyone could see. (If you think I am kidding, just ask Chris, my belly-buddy. I actually did it several times.).

As the night progressed, I thought, "Gee, if I am going to perform this dance in front of people in March, it's a good thing I am in the back row..."

It was a few minutes after that that Kalista explained the choreography...and as it turns out, front turns to back and back to front, side to side, whatever, and at some point I will be exposed for the fraud I am...in front of a crowd.

Perhaps I will block it out, like the time I was on stage with choir (before a large crowd), and I was saying my lines, but the director was waving his arms and gesticulating and I got distracted staring at him and was wondering what I was doing wrong, and I forgot what I was supposed to say and apparently I laughed and then sat down. I have no recollection of this. Jeremy was there, and told me what happened afterwards.

All I could say was, "I WHAT??!!"

As I was lying in bed last night, my brain kept trying to do the dance correctly. It wouldn't stop! Hopefully this means my body will memorize everything and wow everyone next week. Of course, it's possible that nobody even noticed my failed attempts at graceful dancing yesterday, but that in no way appeals to my egocentric tendencies.


P.S. Perhaps I can use belly dancing as a threat: "Don't make me come over there and belly dance!" "NO! PLEASE!"


Since my children have inherited my, uh, distorted spacial perception, I could create a whole generation that uses belly dancing as punishment. I should probably feel worse about my kids running into walls and door nobs...but hey, I was the same way, and I turned out okay.

Comments

Tina said…
That was the best!! I remember that commercial and I bet you look better than that cow...

So, was that experience in LDC with the whole forgetting what you were going to say? I want to say I remember that, but then again I don't remember much about that year since I was engaged/married the whole time. I was preoccupied and distracted.

I love how you are going to use your belly dancing as a punishment. That made me laugh. Thanks for being so creative and making my day!
Anonymous said…
Yup, good ol' LDC...poor Bro. Brenchley got more than he bargained for when he let me in the choir!
Rebecca's Oasis said…
that was funny! you have guts! I don't think i could participate in belly dancing (afraid of the jello comments)

any way! I was pretty good at Western Line Dancing and ended up being an instructor and one a tush push contest :) The trophy is somewhere in the house :)

Maybe you'll end up being an instructor and winning the belly bop contest :)
Unknown said…
You did great! If you want to work on anything outside of class let me know. I might get one of the cd's. :)
leafhopper said…
There is a belly dance instructor in my ward. We did it for RS one night kind of embarrassing. hahaha
Dara, It should make you feel better that I also have absolutely no recollection of that instance, either.
Katscratchme said…
Maybe next time, I'll be able to take the class with you.. I'll be jiggling and you'll be lithe and graceful.

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