Friday, October 4, 2013

Tastes like...

I think baby food is gross.

It looks gross.

It smells gross.

It tastes gross.

None of my kids would eat it, with the exception of Eden.

Emily gave me her year supply of baby food a couple of years ago, and I managed to force several bottles of it down Eden's throat, who only ate it because 1) she liked the facial expressions I made trying to get her excited about it and 2) she is just that kind of accommodating person.

She moved onto pre-chewed foods and massive amounts of Cheerios shortly after, smiling all the way.

Years pass...

And I suddenly have another baby that is ready for solids.

How did that happen?

Well, I know HOW it happened, but really, how did it happen??

A few weeks ago I tried to give Leah apple sauce. Her little brows pulled together and her mouth went flat and wide as the lukewarm apple splob made contact with her tiny, inexperienced taste buds.

And I laughed.

Because I'm mean.

I gave her another spoonful, and, as she refused to swallow, wiped her runny apple sauce drool from her chin.

I was then done doing food experiments on my tiny woman.

But, I kept it in mind.

It was hard not to since she sits on Jeremy's lap every night and watches with longing as each forkful is lifted from the plate, through the air and her open mouth, into Jeremy's gaping maw. And she screams.

But, everything we've had for dinner these last few weeks has had red pepper, dairy, or nuts in it, so she had to put up with Jeremy's pre-chewed watermelon offerings that would inevitably end up on the front of her shirt and leave her with a confused look on her face.

So, when I went to Target last week, and passed the baby aisle, the baby foods caught my eye. Apparently the baby food industry has evolved in the last couple of years, since they had squoogy packages of baby food that looked foreign and slightly astronaut-foodly. I skipped these, and found the magical organic dried baby cereals.

I grabbed three boxes: Rice, Multi-grain, and Oatmeal.

So, a few days ago, I decided that Leah needed some rice cereal in her life, due to her incessant screaming at the breakfast table as I gobbled down my toast and smoothie.

I was prepared for the rejection.

I swirled the water and powdered rice around the bowl, and decided it was a nice consistency. I loaded up the baby spoon and approached Leah's mouth. She opened her mouth about 1/10000 of an inch, and I shoved the rubber spoon in.

I waited for the face. The apple sauce face, but more appalled, followed by the shudder.

Nothing.

Not a blip on her radar.

So, I scooped more onto the spoon, and this time she opened her mouth, and blankly gummed it, swallowing at infrequent intervals.

She ate the whole bowl (not that it was that much...it was like 1 tbsp).

I was astonished!

This whole experience brought up a slew of questions from the other littles, about baby food, and if they had liked it, etcetera, with the general consensus that baby food is just gross, and of argument.

Today, I tried again. Maybe the last time was a fluke.

She ate it benignly, drooling much, and looking bored.

I decided that I needed to taste it.

That white, blobby rice looked at me.

And I'll be honest, I was a little scared to try it. I mean, it's baby food. It's gross.

I lifted the spoon to my grimacing mouth, and stuck my tongue out and gently licked the top of the rice cereal blob.

It tasted like nothing.

Nothing at all.

It was weird.

It was like somebody had managed to solidify air and turn it into a smooth, tasteless mass.

No wonder Leah was eating it. It didn't register to her brain as anything but solid air with a slight, sort-of texture.

Better than gross, I suppose.

I'm kind of mad that I paid top dollar for silk-smooth air food, though.

Maybe that's why it was so expensive.

1 comment:

Katscratchme said...

Haha! I liked watching my babies faces when they tried new food. I laughed a lot in sadistic pleasure..
I will say, I'm really glad we're past that phase and onto trying to get them to eat something besides macaroni and cheese, and chicken nuggets. My children WILL have sophisticated taste buds. :)

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