I Hate Winter

The first winter we lived in Dale's house, I experienced a first.

It wasn't pleasant.

I went to my sink, and turned on the water, and nothing happened.

"Crap," I thought to myself. "We've been here six months and I've already broken Dale's house..."

I tried to figure out why the cold water worked, and the hot water didn't, and I thought myself in a find mess indeedy.

I mean, how do you fix that kind of problem? How much does it cost to replace a hot water pipe?? How hard is it???

Jeremy came in while I was hyperventilating next to the kitchen sink, and I confessed my house-breakingness, and gave him a huge-eyed stare, hoping he would take pity on me.

Jeremy took over, and shortly determined that the pipe was frozen.

And THAT'S why Jeremy went on a mission to Minnesota. Because, you know, it was vitally important for him to acquire that knowledge.

Anyway, we quickly turned a space heater on the frozen area (which is behind a wall), and within 20 minutes, we had hot water.

Whew.

Close call.

Last winter was a dud. It was like extended autumn that mutated into spring, so we were spared pipe freezage.

This year, however, it's been like Arctic Purgatory, especially up here on the foothills. The only signs of life outside are the deer tracks that zig-zag across the yard, showing their frantic searching for anything edible (they ate an entire pine tree last year, much to our dismay. Dale was okay with it, though, since he didn't like the tree...). Jeremy dances a little with glee when they make it down by our windows since they eat all the ivy.

Anyway, yesterday, I turned on the water, and, this time, there was no water. None. Not a drip.

I felt like I had been thrown back a few centuries. And for a germaphobe, not being able to wash my hands every 30 seconds is highly disturbing.

I pulled out the space heater and turned it on the pipes, and shortly had cold water. The hot water was just being stubborn, and didn't budge.

And then the space heater died.

Jeremy got a new one, and we turned it on the cranky pipes, but nothing happened. All the dirty dishes in the dishwasher had to remain dirty and in the dishwasher, and we had to hope that the next day (today) would prove warmer and then I could run the dishwasher.

Jeremy tried the water at 5 AM, and nothing.

I woke up and turned the heater on again at 8:30. I figured it wouldn't take too long. I mean, it only took 20 minutes the first time, so the time should be comparable, right? Especially with a new space heater? Right???

I waited through breakfast...hoping to hear the rush of water through the pipes...nothing...

And now I had a sink full of breakfast dishes...Which meant that I had successfully used up all my dishes.


Which meant I had to do all the dishes by hand so we HAD dishes to use.

No big deal, right?

WRONG.

When you have no hot water, it means you have to heat up water. Multiple times.

So, after spending an eternity washing up a day and half's worth of dishes, I decided to take things into my own hands, and use my hair dryer on the pipe, hoping that would speed things along.

I sat on the floor for 15 minutes blowing hot air into a 4'' X 4" hole.

And then my dryer died.

Great.

So, I put the space heater back, and waited, hoping that by some miracle the pipes would unfreeze...and that the miracle would happen soon because I didn't want to wash dishes by hand again.

It took SEVEN HOURS. SEVEN.

And when it finally came on, I felt like this:

"AT LAST!"

 (That's Jafar, just in case you were confused)
Sheesh...

So now I have the faucet at a steady drip. That ain'ta gonna happen again. Even if my water bill is $4000.