BFF

I've always believed that love will melt anyone down.

The hardest, crustiest, nastiest people will eventually puddle into warm chocolaty goodness if you persist in loving them.

Or so say all the novelists I tend to attach myself to.

I have tried that. And I have believed it with my whole little tiny heart.

I kind of wonder, though, if my theory is fundamentally flawed.

Or maybe my execution is flawed. 

I mean, I guess you have to ask yourself what your motivation is. 

Is it good to do kind things for someone if your main reason is that you are hoping you will be best friends in return?

Is that loving unconditionally? 

I don't know. 

And rejection is all the more painful when you try and try, and then the recipient of your semi-non-conditional love doesn't care.

The thought just makes me want to give up on the human race all together and just become a hermit.

But I don't know if hermit-ness meshes well with the gospel of Jesus Christ.

I can just see me on judgement day:

"Sorry, Lord, I just couldn't hack it...all that being with people and trying to be appropriately charitable....Hermitude seemed like an appropriate course of action."

*ZAP*

*DING*

"Now entering the 11th level of Outer Darkness. Enjoy your stay."

Makes me think of a scripture, "Be not weary in well doing."

I guess you have to change your perspective.

If God says that by serving his children, you are serving him, then maybe you should go out looking to serve him, and since he has given you every breath, every blink, and every step, that should be enough. Anything we do for his children is just small payment for the gift of being on earth one more day.

And then maybe rejection or lack of reciprocity wouldn't sting, since it's not about them, it's about Him.

I don't know if that makes sense.

It sorta makes me feel a little better, though.