Tuesday, October 18, 2011

Tuna-Barbie Melt











Years ago, I got a Barbie for my birthday.

Not just any Barbie...

It was a Peaches and Cream Barbie.

She was just lovely.

Until, that is, David threw her up in a tree and her face melted.

I wasn't too pleased.

Barbies were a rare commodity in our house (save the Michael Jackson Barbie we inherited from our neighbors, which was quickly decapitated, and squeals reigned as we discovered that he had, not a wiggly piece of plastic [if you've decapitated a barbie, you know what I am talking about...I've personally done many], but a squid-like cone thingy, and I don't think that Michael ever got his head back. He was far too awesome without one.), so I was justly mortified when David threw her up into the tree and watched in horror as her pretty face melted away in the sunny So. Cal. heat.

I guess there are worse ways to die.

Well.

Maybe not.

I mean, it took several weeks for her face to disappear, and no amount of shaking the tree made any difference.

I think I may have complained to Mom or Dad, but I think Barbies-Up-Trees problems fell to the bottom of the list of important things-to-stop-my-monster-children-from-doing Mom had.

I don't know if Dad had a list.

If he had one, it would probably look like this:

1. Write something awesome about Lord of the Rings.

2. Publish something awesome I wrote about Lord of the Rings.

3. Play "Rogue."

4. Read Lord of the Rings.

5. Swim in the pool in my barely-there ice cube-blue swim trunks, and scare my children.

6. Dry off, and secretly wish I had a Lord of the Rings towel.

I totally forgot the whole point of this blog.

Oh well.

Something about being picked on...or something.

P.S. I just clicked spell check, and it said "No Misspellings Found." That's like getting an A+++ in Bloggerness!

4 comments:

Katscratchme said...

Great blog!
I especially liked Dad's "list"... I thought I was going to have a heart, brain and asthma attack all at the same time.

Trillium said...

So sorry that saving your birthday Barbie and killing David didn't make my "list" that year . . . .
Maybe someday you can forgive us all for failing you.

Zaphod said...

Hey! You stole my stuff! Sic'em Frodo!

Rebecca said...

i was concerned that maybe David had microwaved the barbie and put her into a tuna sandwhich....

pretty funny! I love dad's list too.

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