Wednesday, August 3, 2011


So, I've made it to Level 3 of the 30-Day Shred. Look at me in my awesomeness! I mostly "progressed" because I was tired of levels 1 and 2. What can I say? I have the attention span of a gnat. Mostly when I do level 3, I stand and stare in utter disbelief at the TV while I try not to have a heart attack or stroke, or, in all likelihood, both.

I think I need to change my approach to life.

I've been trying to eat better...You know, lots of fruits and vegetables, drink lots of water, go with small amounts of meat a day, if any...And I feel really good, and in control of my life when I do. I feel happy...smug even. In the past, I've been able to maintain eating like that for months.

Nowadays, I do really, REALLY well, unless I go shopping, or to the movies, or explore my pantry for too long, or the outside fridge, or think too long about fried potatoes, or anything fried for that matter...

Jeremy had the brilliant idea to take the kids to see a movie yesterday afternoon (We watched Kung Fu Panda 2...Joshua spent the whole time yelling "OH YEAH!" while bouncing up and down on his bottom while the fuzzy creatures beat the tar out of each other. I felt like I had failed as a parent for bringing my tender little people to that film...Of course, Lily wasn't paying attention, but was alternately falling down the stairs and running up and down the aisles yelling "DA! DA! DA!" and Eva was mainly concerned with, "where'd the popcorn go?" and Eden just sat in her car seat snorting her indifference.)

Now, I have a weakness for popcorn, specifically Theater Popcorn.

"Would you like extra butter on your popcorn?" They ask.

"Just dip the entire bag in the stuff, please, and let it sit for a minute," is my reply.

I like it THAT much (I have a similar approach to mayonnaise at Subway..."Just keep going...yeah, a little more...keep going....")

Like, I would seriously lick it if it was dripping off my fingers, and running down my arms.

And I also have a weakness for candy, specifically any candy.

So, going to the movies was a total blow to my diet, er...I mean, lifestyle.

Before I knew what was happening, half the popcorn was gone, and I was frantically searching around my seat for all the lost pieces, and the two boxes of candy we bought.

It was really, really sad.

When we got home, to amend our wicked ways for filling them up with so much sodium, high fructose corn syrup, and empty-calories, we gave the kids some whole wheat bread, and threw them in bed.

I didn't eat anything, being too busy cleaning up (read: on the computer).

Jeremy came in from changing the cat's poop box, and immediately started pulling things out of the fridge (I swear, nothing dampens that man's appetite).

The wheat noodles didn't do it for me.

So, I decided I needed to eat an obscene amount of Otter Pops.

I think I'm bi-polar.

Or my stomach is, or something.

Today I made some machine-less ice cream, and then worked out.

I'm thinking I either found the ultimate compromise, or the universe it scheduled to implode any minute now...


Trillium said...

You made me laugh. You made me cry. (From laughing)

I checked to see if you had posted a new blog (this one) because I had just read the news headlines about the sorry state of our economy and our politicians. It made me feel horrible. Your blog put a smile on my face. Thank you!

Rebecca said...

you know, this life is where we learn and become better... :) I struggle with the good and bad eating habits every day. Eventually we will figure it out.

Tara said...

"...specifically any candy" Ahhh, I heart you!

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