Friday, October 2, 2009


Communication is one of the necessities of marriage (I could be wrong, I suppose, but I really don't think I am...Feel free to argue.). Well, I take it back...GOOD communication is one of the necessities of marriage (Feel free to argue that, too.). You can have a lot of communication in marriage that can hurt the other, that can keep the other informed of facts, or that is just plain stupid. But, stupid communication is okay if it lends itself to amusing your spouse, and laughter is good, right??

I am semi-deaf in one ear. It's not bad, but if I am, say, lying on my side and you start talking, I don't get much. I'll just smile and nod a lot. I suppose this is a dangerous position to take, since who knows what I might be agreeing to. Which is probably why I am about to have another baby.

Jeremy has selective hearing, and that's just about as bad as being semi-deaf--and it doesn't help that I have a quiet voice. You pop that boy in front of a movie and he is gone. He can't hear a thing. Even if he has watched the movie 100 times. Even if it's something mind-numbing, like Lady and the Tramp. It's like his brain is teleported into space and his body is left behind. (I suppose I do that sometimes. Mostly my brain tends to filter out the incessant high-pitched whining that goes on around here and I only "come to" when the pitch is lowered and the speaker starts going, "mommymommymommymommymommy" at which point I turn and say, exasperated and startled, "WHHHAAAAATTT????!!!!!" It's like being woken up in the middle of the night by a racoon jumping on your face.)

The result of our union is a lot of nonsense going back and forth.

Today, as we stood in the kitchen putting away groceries, Jeremy gazed out the window (he has a tendency to peek through the shades all sneaky-like when people walk by. I can totally see him as one of those neighbors people think are weird. I can't get him to stop.), and said (names have been changed),

"Hey! There is know who I am talking about??"



At this point I turned to put something away.

"I believe she is segmented like an ant," Jeremy commented.

I started laughing.

"What did you say?"

"I said, I believe she served a mission."

"That's not what I heard..."

Ah, what would life be like with perfect hearing? I am glad I don't. I think God gave me my ears the way they are because he knew I would find it funny.


Rebecca said...

I have heard some extremely odd things too - my hearing is a little faulty...

Most of the time I can't understand victor because he speaks too low.

Trillium said...

There's a lot of that going around (for a lot of years)!

"You're deeef!"

"You mumble!"

"I do not mumble."


Katscratchme said...

With us it's not so much mishearing what the other said. It's more like hearing and immediately forgetting what the other said.

"So where's that light your mom gave us? You know the one for winter?"

"It's over by the bookcases. It's that black package that you keep asking me about."

Blank stare...

"You've picked that thing up at least 4 times and asked me what it is and every time I tell you, you act like you've never seen it before."


Zaphod said...

Trillium just about has it right. There is a great blessing in deafness.

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