When The Sun Comes Up
The last year has been one of the hardest in my life. It felt like nothing was ever going to be right again... That I would never feel normal again... That I would never feel happy again... My Dad getting sick snuck up on everyone. I didn't realize that him being sick would make my spirit sick. Making dinner, doing laundry, putting my kids in bed, moving from the spot I was sitting in to do anything at all became excrutiating. It was like swimming in a boiling sea of suffering: His, Mom's, mine, everyone else who shares his blood. Every day was like a horrible reset of a nightmare that I couldn't escape. And then he died, and it was like night fell and didn't stop falling. In desperation, I asked Tammy, "What do we do? Give us all advice." Tammy stopped and thought for a moment. I will never, ever forget her words: "The first year is the hardest. It will hit you out of nowhere sometimes." I was dismayed, but so, so grateful for her thoughtful ...